Rock-Hard Mindsets Holding You Down?

(anglický příspěvek) Do you ever meet someone whose mindset was as hard as a rock? Everybody who is in the business of giving advice, or supporting people in getting things done, or providing a service designed to improve their clients' results, will have heard one or more versions of the following: "Oh, I tried that before. It didn't work. In fact, it won't work (, because…)."

Do you ever meet someone whose mindset was as hard as a rock? Everybody who is in the business of giving advice, or supporting people in getting things done, or providing a service designed to improve their clients' results, will have heard one or more versions of the following: "Oh, I tried that before. It didn't work. In fact, it won't work (, because...)." Imagine you are in this line of business, and you just know it will work. You have used your approach successfully with many clients in the past and, all things being equal, you know what you are recommending has a good chance of success. If only they'd give it a chance. But they won't as long as you don't work past this initial reaction driven by an unyielding mindset.

Mindsets are by nature very inflexible, and in fact they are harder than a rock in many cases. (I just happened to get a lot of questions after a workshop about me being in the "soft skills business", dealing with "soft factors". Now think again if you really believe any of the following is softJ!)

A mindset has the following characteristics:
1. It is a strongly held belief or conviction.
2. It really feels true to the person with the mindset.
3. There is attachment to or identification with the mindset.
4. Disagreement with the mindset often triggers negativity.
5. The mindset correlates with both actions and avoidance.

Another thing about mindsets is that it is easy to see them in others, but very hard to see them in ourselves. We like to think that we don't have mindsets. Obviously, we have opinions (based on experience) and we have certain ideas regarding how we should run our businesses. But we are definitely not stuck in any mindsets. Is that so?

It is mindsets, not circumstances, that shape performance and results. So if you have ever been stuck and unable to produce a particular result, it logically follows that there had to be an opposing mindset firmly in place or there would have been no struggle. EVERYTHING you experience is based on a mindset. Every thought, every opinion, every attitude, every business practice, every principle, every creative idea, everything we do in our business (and life) is based on mindsets. In a way, we could almost say there exists NOTHING BUT mindsets.
Fortunately though, there are two kinds of mindsets: constrictive and expansive.

An expansive mindset is a way of saying "an open mind." An expansive mindset sees new possibilities, is not defensive, is curious and interested in how things work. An expansive mindset is always wondering how to make things better, make a bigger contribution and how to grow. Great performance and results come from expansive mindsets.
In some areas of our lives we all have an expansive mindset. For instance, when it comes to my own business and to my self-marketing, I have a quite expansive mindset. As a result, I experience my business as fun and challenging, interesting and exciting. I don't struggle in my business, I enjoy my work tremendously and usually produce excellent results.

A constrictive mindset is a way of saying "a closed mind." A constrictive mindset sees difficulties, problems, and obstacles. It insists on being right and is not very interested in exploring or learning or growing. A constrictive mindset is always thinking how to be comfortable and safe. Poor performance and results come from constrictive mindsets.

In some areas of our lives we have constrictive mindsets. For instance, fitness has always been a struggle for me. I just don't wake up thinking about exercising and dietary supplements, I think of sleeping in and having a gourmet breakfast... I'm not really overweight, but I readily admit I am a little out of shape. So although this doesn't come naturally to me, I have found ways to change my mindsets surrounding nutrition and fitness to make sure I don't gain two kilos a year, and have a pretty balanced diet, which is all I need. J.

Here is how relevant this is to YOU and your business: applied to business and your career the question is: what are your constrictive mindsets? You don't have to worry about your expansive ones, they will take care of themselves. The only way to transform a constrictive mindset into an expansive one is to first realize that you have that mind set and then look at what it is costing you (in results and fulfilment). The next step is to start imagining what things would be like without that old mindset.

Let's take a practical example of recently promoted managers. The symptoms are variations on "I'm not sure this is for me, I'm not a politics person" and "I just want my old job back, just a little more say in what we should do". The new challenges are evaluated from a constrictive, not expansive perspective.

Would they like to be perceived as serious professionals in management meetings? Would they like to drive discussions in a constructive way? Present their ideas with maximum impact? Have natural authority and clarity in their contributions and actions? Know when to put up a fight and when to accept a decision as a given? Sell an unpopular decision to themselves first so that they can then persuade their teams? Or ask for a return favour every time they bail out a team member? Of course they would!!

There are specific how-tos for all of those areas. But before anyone can learn the techniques and skills to implement them, I assure you that they will find the process a whole lot easier if they transform their constrictive mindsets first. The rule of thumb - and by extension, the raison d'etre for coaching - is: Transform first, learn how-tos second.

If you'd like to learn more about mindsets and yours in particular, I invite you to explore my e-book "Objectively Speaking" which will help you understand in more detail the mechanisms behind mindsets and how they can manipulate you. More often than not, it isn't enough to just "expose" a mindset that clearly doesn't work too well for us. We can't just "reason" ourselves into believing something different, let alone the opposite. So if you decide to transform some of your die-hard constrictive mindsets into expansive ones, contact me about that (and yes, this means a small investment in one-on-one time). Or get some quality information first (FYI this eBook exists in Czech and German but not -yet- English).

My bottom line though is that there is nothing more important you can do in your business than work on those mindsets that keep you down! If you don't, chances are you will simply avoid these issues. Because no matter how much information and strategies and tactics you learn, it is highly unlikely you will ever apply them if your constrictive mindsets are still firmly in place.

Have a wonderful Spring!

Annette B. Reissfelder

Author is Professional Accredited Coach

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